Day 57 - New workouts! Guaranteed to train you to seduce your man, or beat him up!

I came across this article about workouts that are different and work your body in different ways.  I had to comment on it because it has one of my absolute favorites in the list! :)  In this blog entry, I'm giving my opinion of these workouts, but for all of the information, read the full article HERE.

1)  Sports Drills - Ever want the body of Gabi Reese? Maybe Anna Kournikova? This drills are designed to improve your skill in certain sports.  While they are generally for certain athletes, some gyms offer classes or training for individuals who just want a different workout.

2) Boxing - I love boxing.  Not only do you learn how to kick some as.... ummm.. butt, you get a great workout.  Trust me, when you do 2-minute rounds of bob-and-weave/hook combos, the next day your abs will be hating loving you.  Really. :) 

3) Boot Camp - Some of you may have already tried this workout.  I have to say I haven't done this. Not since I was in Air Force ROTC in college. And that was about *cough* *mumbled number* years ago.  But I will say this, if it is anything like actual military boot camp?? It's a really awesome workout.

4)  Kettlebell Lifting - I'm going to be honest.  I have never tried kettlebells.  The closest I have gotten to them is watching the contestants on The Biggest Loser sweating and groaning with them.  Maybe my problem is from watching Jillian kill them... hmmmmmm.... *rubs chin*

5) KRAV MAGA - Can you tell which is my favorite??  In fact, I had to put a different picture on here because the one in the article was kind of wimpy.  (I got this picture from an article at chicagonow.com.  Krav is a great, and addictive, workout.  It is the Israeli form of self-defense/fighting.  And let me just tell you - - after a tough day at work? It's therapeutic to go to a class and punch, hit, kick, etc. on a bag.  And women, don't worry, the techniques were specifically formed to be applicable for both men and women.  I have to say it is very satisfying to be paired up with the new guy who says "I don't want to hurt you," which would then be proceeded by you kicking their tooshes.  *insert evil grin here* Moving on!

6)  Muay Thai Kickboxing - Again, a really great workout.  It is similar to Krav in that it is physically intense, uses muscles you didn't know you had, and trains you to be mentally prepared.  I have taken classes in this as well, and it is really incredible.  One thing I can add,  in most martial arts classes, you are using what has been called "bursting energy."  Meaning you go from 0 to 100 in one second.  You will go at very high intensity for a short time, and then have a period of rest.  In fact, since this kind of workout is so different than endurance training, marathon runners and other endurance athletes have a hard time with it.  Makes me feel good actually. :)

7)  Fusion Dance - Okay, I have never tried this, but it seems incredibly cool.  To me, the name 'fusion dance' seemed like a new weird type of dancing that I didn't think I would be into.  However!! I was proved wrong.  What it means is that they have fused several dance styles into one class.  In a class, you may learn to salsa, or waltz, or do ballet, etc. Sounds pretty cool huh? And if you ever become famous and make it to Dancing with the Stars, you will already have a leg up.

8)  Bikram Yoga - For more information, see the article.  I am already wanting to get into yoga to increase my core strength and flexibility.  But adding heat is supposed to increase circulation and help your joints.  Like I said, I don't know anything about it, so I'll refrain from giving judgement.

9)  Belly Dancing - Okay, this just seems really cool and/or fun.  I looks like you would work your abs a TON.  Even those pesky lateral abs.  And hey -- if you want to practice in front of the hubby/fiance/boyfriend?  I'm sure they won't mind. *insert evil laugh here*

10) Exotic Dancing - Now, let's make sure that we have this clear.  They are suggesting pole dancing classes.  Not going out and pole dancing at a bar.  Not that there is anything wrong with that.  Just sayin'.  But man, have you ever seen what those women can do with a pole?? Holy crap.  I'd kill myself.  But it seems incredibly cool.  And again - I'm sure that the man in your life might allow you to practice for him.  Just don't let him install a pole in the bedroom.  It won't match the bedding.  (Maybe.  Although I haven't seen your bedding. I'm just making a guess.)

So there ya go!  If you guys try any of these, and love... or loathe... them, let me know!  What do you guys think?  Are you going to try any of these?

Karma and the 12-inch stride from hell...

I'm thinking that the universe is trying to tell me something...

Remember how I told you that I got an elliptical trainer?  Works great, except I can't move the stride lengths because the pin mechanism is broken.  I called.  After about 1/2 hour trying to explain that a brand new machine shouldn't be broken, they sent me the replacement parts and had a gentleman *cough* not-so-gentlemanly *uncough* call me to tell me to call him when I get the parts.

Parts came.

One out of three were backordered.

Still haven't gotten the parts, nor have I had my elliptical fixed.

It's karma.  I finally go to do something good and healthy for me, and what happens? It's broken.  Maybe I did something bad and it's the universes way of telling me what a horrible person I am....  Maybe the swearing and yelling at people on the highway to and from work has come back to bite me in the ass. Maybe it's the revelry I had in daydreaming about my ex-graduate adviser waking up with a missing penis, which shouldn't be too bad since it has to be extremely tiny in the first place.  Or maybe it was the wishing that the woman at the store who was incredibly mean to me got her comeuppance for which she had to grovel at my feet and beg my forgiveness.

Whatever it was, it came back and slapped me down!

Okaaaaaaaaay.... so it doesn't mean that I can't use it.  It's set on the 12" stride which works your quads. But let's be honest here.  After about 1 minute on that setting, and my legs are screaming "What the hell?!?!  Nothing for three years and now this??  Have you started doing drugs or something??"  Sadly, no, I can't blame my self torture on drugs of any kind.  And I'm sure that in some strange parallel universe there's the anti-me who is happy to have this problem and is on the elliptical 10 hours a day, happy as a clam. But this is my universe and the elliptical isn't getting much action.

But!  I vow from this moment to stop grumbling at the brokeness of my elliptical, and ignore the complaints of my quads, and get back up and going.  I'll let you know how it goes. :D

Wait... what? I have no excuse now?

DAMNIT! Foiled again!

I got my elliptical today. WOO HOO! Although now, all excuses for not getting cardio in are voided. But that's okay.  I put it together myself over the course of a few hours. And I was really excited.... but it was too good to last.  My elliptical has an adjustable stride length.  The kind were you pull the pin and adjust the bars.  But I went to adjust it.  So I pulled the pin... and I pulled... and pulled harder... got down on the floor and braced my feet against the machine and pulled with two arms.  NOTHING! 

My brand new NordicTrack elliptical is broken. *sigh*  But they are sending the part out and a technician. But I have to wait another week.  That's incredibly annoying.  No?

But I can now get cardio in while watching TV which I think it way cool.

Jennie's Advice

I recently discussed weight loss/exercise with a friend of mine, Jennie.  Jennie has a claim to fame on this blog by coming up with the title "Climbing out of the Lard Pit."  She's a funny gal!

Now, I have never considered Jennie overweight in the slightest, but she has been taking health and exercise quite seriously. She has some major self will and determination!  I wanted to ask her, since she has a rockin' post- *garbled mumbled age* body, what her regiment was and if she had any tips for me.

The first thing she said, and I totally agree, is that you have to make the decision.  I know that is the reason I was unwilling and unable to do anything about my weight before this.  I just hadn't gotten to the place where I was ready to do it.  Get your mind in the right place, and it will happen from there.

One tool that Jennie found extremely helpful for her and suggested for me is Livestrong's "The Daily Plate."  I took a look at it and it really is a great website tool.  It allows you enter how many pounds a week you want to lose and it calculates how many calories you need eat for that weight loss.  (Just don't put in 10 pounds for a week okay?)  You can track the foods you eat and get your calorie count for the day  - - which forced some accountability on you too. (As long as you don't "forget" to add that donut you had at this office. ha ha) You can enter any exercise that you do to find out how many calories you actually burned.  And the best part is that it's free.  YAY!  Something worthwhile that you don't have to pay for. Isn't that something?? :)

Something that worked for Jennie is the dreaded 'no eating after 8pm.'  That's a hard thing to do for night owls like us!  Also, if you need a snack during the day, pick something like one package of light string cheese (60 calories), or a piece of fruit or a veggie.  That is much better than chips out of the vending machine (even if they are baked chips).

For exercise, when she's not hitting the gym hardcore, she suggests an 1 1/2 hours at the gym.  I didn't write this down but I think that is an hour of cardio and 1/2 hour of weights.  When she's hitting the gym hardcore, it can be anything from yoga to weight training to cardio classes to treadmill, etc.  And if I'm correct, I believe she hits the gym twice a day when she's hardcore.  Let me tell ya -- this woman has some determination!!  Did I mention she runs marathons too?  I know... I think she's crazy too. :)  But what can I say? I like crazy people.

And so ends Volume 1 of "Fabbity Fab Advice from the Dr. Ruth's of Health and Wellness to the Attempting Escapees of the Lardpit."