Karma and the 12-inch stride from hell...

I'm thinking that the universe is trying to tell me something...

Remember how I told you that I got an elliptical trainer?  Works great, except I can't move the stride lengths because the pin mechanism is broken.  I called.  After about 1/2 hour trying to explain that a brand new machine shouldn't be broken, they sent me the replacement parts and had a gentleman *cough* not-so-gentlemanly *uncough* call me to tell me to call him when I get the parts.

Parts came.

One out of three were backordered.

Still haven't gotten the parts, nor have I had my elliptical fixed.

It's karma.  I finally go to do something good and healthy for me, and what happens? It's broken.  Maybe I did something bad and it's the universes way of telling me what a horrible person I am....  Maybe the swearing and yelling at people on the highway to and from work has come back to bite me in the ass. Maybe it's the revelry I had in daydreaming about my ex-graduate adviser waking up with a missing penis, which shouldn't be too bad since it has to be extremely tiny in the first place.  Or maybe it was the wishing that the woman at the store who was incredibly mean to me got her comeuppance for which she had to grovel at my feet and beg my forgiveness.

Whatever it was, it came back and slapped me down!

Okaaaaaaaaay.... so it doesn't mean that I can't use it.  It's set on the 12" stride which works your quads. But let's be honest here.  After about 1 minute on that setting, and my legs are screaming "What the hell?!?!  Nothing for three years and now this??  Have you started doing drugs or something??"  Sadly, no, I can't blame my self torture on drugs of any kind.  And I'm sure that in some strange parallel universe there's the anti-me who is happy to have this problem and is on the elliptical 10 hours a day, happy as a clam. But this is my universe and the elliptical isn't getting much action.

But!  I vow from this moment to stop grumbling at the brokeness of my elliptical, and ignore the complaints of my quads, and get back up and going.  I'll let you know how it goes. :D

Erik Chopin: Confessions of a Reality Show Loser

I am only 8 minutes into this show and felt the overwhelming urge to write a commentary about this show.  

For those of you who don't know, Erik Chopin (Erik Chopin's Webpage) was the Season 3 Biggest Loser winner.  He was awesome - and looked pretty hot, I might add! :)  He weighed in at 407 lbs at the beginning of Biggest Loser and finished at 193 lbs.  

But now he's crept back up to 368.2 lbs.  He recently decided to be up front with his struggle on shows like Oprah and Biggest Loser's "Where are they now?" recap show.

And tonight he was on a short documentary called "Confessions of a Reality Show Loser."  He was really candid about his struggles with weight especially after the show.  I can almost feel what he must be feeling because I, too, thought "I will never put this weight back on again." And where am I? Back to my highest weight ever.


There are a few things that he talked about on a new documentary  that I wanted to cover.

The part that got me frustrated enough to start this commentary was his wife's reaction.  She started crying and saying things like "I can't go through this again." and "I'm sorry. I feel bad for you."  I know that she just wants her husband to be happy. I understand that. I really do.  But some of the things she said made my jaw drop and wince a bit.  I know that she didn't mean it the way it sounded, but if someone said those things to me, it would have made me feel horrible inside.


But I wish she heard what he said when he said that he didn't want to live and she asked why... he said "Cause I can't figure out what else I should be doing on this planet."  And I'm right there with him.  Weight issues are always about something else besides food.  Sometimes it is about not knowing what is really your passion in life, and feeling like you are trapped in a life that you don't really want. (My words, not his.)

 AH HA! I was right.  He had sold his business while doing the promotion with the Biggest Loser.  And when the money he won and the money from endorsements dwindled, he had to find a job, which meant that he ended up working for/with his dad.  This job he says he doesn't hate but....  like I said, there's no passion.  With that came depression.  With depression comes weight gain. Yeah... I don't know anything about that.  Nope. Not a bit. *cough*  *looking for lightning to strike me down* MOVIN' ON!

 Erik's mom is kind of busting his chops about people asking her about him and "Is he keeping the weight off?" etc.  Followed up by "I have a busy schedule, and I find the time."  And the next part??  What did she cook for them? BABY BACK RIBS!! What the hell?!?!  You can not bust him for weight gain and then feed him baby back ribs. Because..... "It's Sunday." and that's a special day so it should be okay. 

Of course, this has had a toll on their marriage.  The intimacy has gone down, which again, I understand. But I also understand that when his wife and his mother tried to approach him about, it "was not well received" and that he did some head biting. Again, been there, done that. 

The counselor just asked him if he could make a commitment to making different choices, and Erik said "I know the right answer, but I also know... it will be so f'ing hard." (He did say eff-ing, not the actual f-word.)  He knows, and I know, that making the healthy decisions makes you feel fantastic. But when you see how many pounds you have to lose, it becomes almost debilitating when you think about it. 

But the biggest part was admitting that you let yourself become like this and actually own up to it.

Okay, going to post this and if there's anything else, I'll come back and edit. Later taters!