Thursday, October 2, 2014

Career fairs, employers, and me... OH MY!

As I near the end of my duration here in Masters-of-Engineering-ville, I went to a career fair in hopes that I would find the company I was meant to work at.  I got a new outfit, curled my hair the way that gets me the most compliments, had my CV ready... I felt good.

Photo linked from:
http://correspondentsdiary.wordpress.com/tag/career-women/
I walked in, all confident-like. The girl in front of me was a young, pretty thing. She was an engineering version of Olivia Pope. The svelte body, killer suit, but with long blond hair, curled so elegantly to the middle of her back. We both headed up the stairs, while a young man from one of the companies was coming down the stairs. Wouldn't you know it. He stopped the young woman and
said to say that she should come by their table.

So, obviously, being right behind her, he would say the same thing to me right?

Wrong.

He looked right at me and said nothing.

Such is my life. It isn't the first time. At my last employer, it was made painfully obvious that what they really valued wasn't how you did your job, but how you looked. Aside from comments directed at me, another instructor in the department got an award at the monthly faculty meeting for weight loss.

It has become completely evident that I have a bias against me. And really, it isn't anyone's fault but my own. I wasn't always this way. But the last decade+, I let my bosses, co-workers, etc. dictate to me how my life should be run. For the last decade+, all I've done is work. I stopped doing everything I felt was fun. (With the exception of hanging with friends whenever I could.) And over the years, the pounds just packed on.

And on.

And on.

And yesterday, it became clear that my weight has affected every single aspect of my life. Not just the active (or rather my now inactive) part, or the relationship part, but the professional part as well. Frankly? I'm quite tired of it.

But I know it that even though I'm tired of it, that doesn't mean that *POOF*, I'll magically be able to change things.  But that doesn't mean that I'm not going to try!! And if I fall down, I'll pick myself right back up and keep going. Right? :) Details to come......
 
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